I am not there now.....

I promised that i would make this day special.....words failed,promises unkept and a faith lost .........earned for that one clasping of my hand.....but alas it was never to be....world would wish today,flowers would bloom,wishes would pour in,blessings will hold you in good stead....but i am not there now.......

Am i excising the right???

There is a need to make a difference in this world .....but how??.....people crib for not being given the right opportunity ......but ever did we ask ourselves as to how much of an effort has been done from our end to achieve that opportunity.Its always nice to blabber or write here making our point sound the best amongst the crowd.......but the real people are those who put this in action and rather go about their business as usual.

Recent issue of just 1000 tickets being kept aside for cricket fans ....whereas making a larger chunk of tickets available for the corporates or elite as they call themselves!!......making movies for the multiplex audience (elite again).........little do people make an effort to think that the actual people who make you a star or a celebrity is the one who earns less and spends half of it to watch you on screen or on field......so how the hell can you forget him\her.A round about discussion with my buddy suggested that these people should be boycotted who dont actually consider the "common man" as their actual means to claim to fame.but alas we are too blinded to see reality and have lived safe.The day we stand up and refuse to be taken for granted is the day we actually have made the difference in our lives."its a call we have to take"

Often we have heard women voicing their concern of not being given their rights.........well if those were your rights ,then why do you ask for it.....go ahead and excise it.......stop being a cry baby...........why do you require to be given a reservation of 33%??? wherein you can own the entire 100%......so its all about how you feel about yourself...........if you have right excise it dont ask someone for it :-)

When i was growing up .....i carved a world around me......lived and rejoiced in it......happiness....pain...didnt make a difference to me.......it was my harem.......dad mentioned to me that you need to endure your pain all alone......build that experience as your strength .....remember those moments of your lives where you look around to find no one......this would teach you that its your journey and you have to walk alone........You would feel a strong presence of the almighty around .....guiding you around......Later part of my life the emotions never reflected on my face ......people seem to recognize me as a happy go lucky kinds........years of having drowned my emotions in myself, had rendered me kinda emotionless practically......couple of people did try to reach out to my inner self...... alas they hurt me in the bargain.......when they left.........each morning i wake up with a void of not having them around me and the question of living an entire life without them.........but life doesnt wait......sometimes its a mixed bag of emotions......you are happy to find some positive changes in your life....but you dont have that one person with whom you wanted to share this happiness.I reach out to people to know their views.....but none suffice the pain.......i dont know why my man put me through this.........well he isnt answering either.......so now i sit in my harem soaking my thoughts with the good times i shared with the special one .........does that person hear me???

Answers.......

Ever had your questions answered???......ever did you understand what ran across your friends mind.....when they gave their opinion??.....ever wondered did the other person feel the intensity of pain as you did??.........why things you wanted were never given......you made good from whatever was available........are we in a rat race to succeed in life........is life fair after all.......we are his own children then why so much disparity......one sleeps with a hunger pangs in his stomach....the other with a broken heart......one lives his entire life in poverty and the other enjoys a silver spoon..??.......dreams in abundance ......desire is one.....which will make this dreams worth living....

You wrote a beautiful chapter in my life..........i hold on to it close to my heart and sleep..........dream the unexpected, desire the unrealistic...........i never tot you would walk away from my dream .....but that's how the script was written..........i look desperately around....smell your fragrance to calm my nerves down.......alas i aint tired ......will love you till my last breath ......

My Faith.....

My faith keeps me going..............i am angry that you have brought me here........are you listening???.....you gave me the dream ..which i treasured ......snatched it away abruptly .......is there a problem???.......i am sure you will come up with a answer to justify your point.........i am gonna die with a regret in my life ......that you weren't fair to me........i know its blasphemy........but i am your child.............i have the right to complain.....cry.....beg....plead for your kindness......you know i sleep with one desire and pray every night for that one dream...for which i am going keep aside all my desires......just for that one dream.....will you please ignite it back for me ???.....cause you are the only one who can do it......that's my faith on you ....dont let me down

I am done!!!!

When i write this ....i am overhelmed by emotions .......life has just stuck you the last sucker punch..........your writhing in pain.......eyes are hazy,moistened .....weak in arms ......look up to see a dark monster ...grinning at his exploit..........at last he has managed to pin you down.........and this time it is done........in the hindsight ...you hear your best buddy egging you to put that effort to stand up and stare in the eye of the monster.........you extend your hand to grab that talisman to revive you .......but alas it has no effect.........Why?????......questions your pal....Sadly i am gonna let you down this time..........The purpose is lost.........hunger has died.......will to survive the onslaught has given in to the pressure life has exerted mercilessly.
No point asking god why me?...........He always gives you the choice........you take the choice which suits you.........but people throw it out of the window......disregard to the emotion....to the person.........in the end it is their choice............you are just there to play the game.......are not part of it............when i look across the window........see people moving .......scan the place.....life isnt waiting.........you are still !!!!
I am sure when i am done......pals will suggest .........comment.........scold you........But its still me.....who has to walk.......but i am done!!!!!!